.order is made from chaos

ACCIO PAIN RELIEF.

Fri, 31 Jul 2009 02:24:59 GMT

Home. Feeling more sore than sorry. Watching Black Books. Sick of crutches. Slept for twenty hours. Stiches won't stop leaking blood.

Thank you so, so much for all the texts and emails. I'm still replying. They made my stay that much better. :)

Here's to the long recovery ahead.

DO IT DO IT DO IT.

Thu, 21 May 2009 09:05:05 GMT

SPAM ME.

I want gifs and pictures and words and shit.

~PROCRASTINATION OVERLOAD.~

THERE'S THE DOOR.

Sat, 16 May 2009 07:15:40 GMT

ffffriends cut.

It had to be done sooner or later. Considering that I don't have much time to read my friend's page because of...life, and the fact that my entries are mostly personal accounts, I like having friends that I can trust and relate to. And when it has come to the point that I avoid reading your entries or you never comment on mine, I took that as a pretty good indication that it is time to move on. If you beg to differ, please voice your opinion but don't get catty. No hard feelings.

So if you can see this post you're a special, special person to me. :)

Fri, 10 Apr 2009 22:45:35 GMT

HONG KONG

11-15 April

We're running really late, haha, so I'll post soon!

I got rid of all my Colin Firth movies in case they consider them erotica.

Mon, 24 Nov 2008 16:25:43 GMT

Before we start, there's one thing that you and I must agree on - Tina Fey is awesomesauce. AWESOMESAUCE! And you'd do absolutely anything to spread the Fey AND 30 Rock love. Yeah? Okay. Read on.

Around two weeks ago, another awesome human being, Cec (better known as cecism) alerted me to an article in which Tina was interviewed about being picked as one of Entertainment Weekly's 'Entertainers of the Year'. (Big mistake EW, she is THE entertainer of the year. The Black Crusader's are so out to get you guys...) ANYWAY, amongst the general flailness of reading words that came from Ms Fey's mouth, Cec happened to come across a rather interesting revelation...Tina Fey calls us "internerds"! Now this term is not to be confused with the people who sit in front of the computer all day playing Second Life or The Sims whilst eating corn chips from a Pooh Bear bowl. Or the ones who can recite program coding from the back of their mindgrapes. No, she's referring to the ~~dozens~~ ~~hundreds~~ ~~millions~~ BILLIONS of dedicated fans like Cec and I who come online to a site such as LJ and discuss and revelate about the 'happenings' of 30 Rock and everyone involved who make the show what it is. ~~And share our fantasies of what we would do to Kenneth Ellen Parcell if given the chance.~~

Oh! And if you don't believe me...

EW: Is Oprah — and all the guest stars this season, like Jennifer Aniston, Salma Hayek, Steve Martin — an effort to draw people in? There's been some griping about it becoming the next Will & Grace...
TF: We always have a lot of guest stars, but we just happen to have a lot of very famous ones this year. I knew it would make the Internerds upset, but they have to just be patient. It's still the same show. We only ever have people who are really good at what they do, and we try to incorporate them into plots.

For whatever reason Cec and I thought that it would be cool to have badges declaring that we are indeed internerds, because y'know we're cool...

So with all the spare time I have, I thought it would be fitting to use that spare time for some good (because that's what Superman does) and create the spoken-of badges! HELLS YEAH!

In an effort to spread the Tina Fey love and just overall act like a bunch of internerds, feel free to take a badge and pledge your alliance to the internerds of the World! (Ooo, I'm good, I should run for vice-president).

Well it's funny you ask because I happen to have just the right answer(s)!

1. Choose a badge below, if you don't like any of them - eat my poo. No, don't.
2. Upload it to your own server, NO HOTLINKING PLEASE.
3. Paste the image link into the code below where it says 'PUT IMAGE LINK HERE'.
4. Paste the code onto your profile page, or wherever you like, and VOILA - you are now an internerd.
5. Leave a comment with your name or ~alias~ and I will add you to the list of 'Official Internerds'.

COPY THIS CODE.

EXAMPLE ONE || EXAMPLE TWO

Onto the badges...

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

NOTE: If there is an overwhelming request for a certain coloured badge or another phrase involving the word, I will be more than happy to make one.

1. gemmi_joo
2. cecism
3. attitude_issues
4. athena2483
5. grayrace
6. gayfortinafey
7. captrenault
8. fancifull
9. gregorypeck
10. glassbomb
11. savingpeople
12 bagelbite117
13. optional_joy
14. stresseater
15. herosquad
16. purpleeater1
17. missy307
18 kopernik
19 aetenae
20. missfoxie
21. tragicbeauty11
22. half_life33
23. 0o_faerie
24. littleninja245
25. verschreibsel
26. conworthy
27. vesisade
28. lynn_42
29. reddgray
30. babydykecate
31. dueladent
32. i_said_boourns
33. michellek
34. flaucinauci
35. ctsquirrel
36. gabx
37. teresadivicenzo
38. whalelines
39. cnnjunky
40. fey_daily
41. fastandfunky
42. cosmiclagoon
43. _onebreath
44. blienky27
45. twentyplanes
46. bertiebob
47. imnosuperman182
48. sinked
49. madscullyx13
50. kefer_kun
51. muic
52. the_popsicle
53. abby_road87
54. sweetbicoco
55. dameadama
56. blergg
57. jenaben
58. loveohlovelove
59. sixphanel
60. stamatina_rae
61. fallon_ash
62. pythiaprophet
63. livlovlaugh
64. s0phi4
65. stop_theworld
66. deneuve
67. eugis
68. bohemean
69. shamethebells
70. savvy_kitten
71. inpeopleshapes
72. op_de_radio
73. lydiandme
74. umbrella_smile
75. vividahlin
76. comedy_emsy
77. ursulageorgi
78. let_me_sing
79. parisiantales
80. jaxparr0w
81. magic_truth
82. book232
83. annaxbanana
84. jayne_arts
85. ronyth
86. misswalsingham
87. amloveaffair
88. ifeelsoweary
89. odakota_rose
90. glitzerpony
91. doll_haze
92. jvrisprudence21
93. onesweetlovexx
--->
1000000.

IN CONCLUSION.

I hope this post has made you want to spread the Fey love, and most of all, was of some amusement. I'm sorry my graphic abilities are not dazzling, so if you would like to make your own badge, feel free, just link it back to this post for credit and of course, to let others become part of the clan.

This badge/group holds no legal binding or anything, it's all in the name of fun.

SO SPREAD THE LOVE, LINK THIS TO YOUR FRIENDS, LETS SHOW TINA FEY WE CARE. *tear*

Damn straight. I'm delightful.

PICSPAM: 30 ROCK [3x03]

Tue, 18 Nov 2008 04:52:23 GMT

Sorry this has come a little late, Photobucket was being a real stick in the mud. I have to say, I didn't enjoy this episode as much as the last two, but I think it's because of my limited (or non-existent to be totally honest) knowledge of Night Court. Nonetheless, still a fabulous episode in which top moments were abound.

OH! And if you haven't caught up on the last two episodes (OMG YOU BETCH), here's a long, soundless recap:

3x01: Do-Over
3x02: Believe in the Stars

TOP MOMENTS.
(basically the whole show)

Kenneth: Ms. Lemon, it’s me, Kenneth Parcell, the page. You probably didn’t recognize me in this new page uniform.
Liz: I recognized you, Kenneth.
Kenneth: The old uniforms were timeless, practical, sexy. But, um, this...This is an outrage! You need to make them go back to the old uniforms.
Liz: I don’t have that kind of authority.
Kenneth: Then what do you do?!

Liz: Hey, I just got a call from security.
Jenna: That’s ridiculous! Why would I steal a file from personnel?
Liz: What? No. Claire is in the lobby.
Jenna: Claire Harper? From Chicago?
Liz: Yup. Fun, crazy Claire.
Jenna: Oh man! Do you remember the night we all danced in that open fire hydrant?
Liz: Yeah. Her roof parties?
Jenna: Karaoke in Boystown.
Liz: The all night scavenger hunts.
Jenna: Do you remember when we crashed that Polish wedding?
Liz: ...Yeah she’s exhausting.
Jenna: Oh I know! She’s gonna make us buy more of her homemade jewelry. Birds always attack me when I wear it.

[Kenneth starts to jump excitedly with the girls before breaking into tears]

OMG he's so adorable.

Jack: Welcome to New York. Lets see, we’re using credit cards, and cabs, all the galleries have moved to Chelsea, and we’re off cupcakes and back to doughnuts.

Tracy: What’s wrong, Ken? You’ve got wife eyes.
Kenneth: I’m just sad sir. I’ve worn this old jacked since 19...and now they’ve just thrown it away.
Tracy: Is there nothing sacred? Have we lost our moral center? It just makes me want to pee on someone.
Kenneth: I appreciate that sir. But rules are rules. I’m just going to have to live with it.
Tracy: I hate to see you like this Ken-Dog. It’s like an owl without a graduation cap; heartbreaking! So what can I buy you to make you happy?

------

Kenneth: Money can’t buy a sunset or a child’s smile, or a satisfying finale to the hit TV show ‘Night Court.’
Tracy: Court? At Night? I’m already laughing! Tell me more!

Claire: Oh hey Liz. Jack was just giving me direction to the...F-Train.

-------

Liz: Back in Chicago I saw her take powerful men down. It didn’t matter if it was Scotty Pippin, or the drummer for the Bodeens, or someone else’s boyfriend who ran a small but prestigious clowning academy.
Jack: Whose boyfriend? [Liz makes a face]

-------

Jack: Having known Claire for a very enjoyable twenty minutes and you for what feels like infinity, I’m going to go with Claire on this one.

Tracy: Ready for your big surprise?
Kenneth: Yes sir! Gosh, last time I was blind folded I had to play piano at that weird masquerade party.
Tracy: Ta-da!
Kenneth: [Squeels] Some of the cast of ‘Night Court’!

-------

Markie: Oh bless your heart. Do you like race cars?
Kenneth: I do!

-------

Kenneth: First I find a quarter this morning...
Charlies: Uh...I lost a quarter earlier...

Jack: To Mi-ou. May tonight’s fundraiser for your fund raising foundation be as successful as last weeks cocktail reception for your rehab center.
Claire: Jack’s just being modest. He won’t tell you, but I will. Today is Jack’s birthday! Hit it boys! [Breaks into song] Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Jackie-bear. Happy birthday to him.

-------

Jack: How did you get in here first of all? And it’s not even my birthday!
Claire: I know isn’t it funny?! What? Oh come on are you mad?
Jack: This is highly inappropriate. I’m going to have to ask you to leave!
Claire: Hey! If I kill myself, it is all your fault! [Crowd gasps] [Jack starts to fake laugh and summons orchestra to start playing]

Liz: Did she do sexy birthday or mannequin who comes to life?
Jack: Sexy birthday. Thank god!

-------

Jack: I’ve got to get out of this. What do other guys do?
Liz: Well, one guy died. Scotty Pippin requested a trade to Houston.
Jack: Houston’s too humid. What about this dying thing?

-------

Liz: Where is she now?
Jack: Chained to the radiator in our hotel room. It was her idea. She’s an amazing woman.

Tracy: My boy, Ken has written a masterpiece. And trust me, I use that word a lot!

-------

Markie: You always thought that you were better for me because you were nominated for Emmys. Well I would have been nominated too, but I was just too hot to be taken seriously!
Harry: Well that wouldn’t be a problem now, would it?
Charles: Uh huh. Court is adjourned.
Kenneth: This is worse than the original finale! What are we going to do?
Tracy: I don’t know, Ken. This is bad. I wish this were an episode of ‘Night Court’ because then there would be some big joke right now. [Long awkward pause]

Tracy: My boy Kenneth, is going through some tough times. They’re making him wear a coat that’s different than his other coat.

Jack: [Answers phone] Lemon?
Liz: Jack! She’s in your house!
Jack: Don’t be ridiculous. The alarm is...[Turns around to find Claire standing there in lingerie]
Claire: I made you a white pizza and a pot roast. I just think you’re, so amazing. Look at me playing house! My god you must think I’m out of my mind! Do you? You just looked away when I said that. I saw you. [Throws away tray] Kiss me, I know your lips will be honest! [Rips off his tie, kisses him]
Jack: Lemon I gotta call you back.
Liz: No!

Jack: Wait, maybe Claire’s right. If we had a baby together things would calm down.

Liz: I’m deleting you from my phone! What? Password!?

Harry: Hey are you with network? How about if Heroes had a new character and his super power was like close up magic.
Liz: What? No. Oh big fan, by the way.

Kenneth: Can I say something?
Liz: Absolutely not.
Kenneth: The only crime any of us are guilty of is caring for one another: Mr. Jordan who tried to cheer me up, These wonderful actors who tried to make a young man’s dream come true. If there’s a law against friendship, then lock me up. But if there isn’t, then the show must go onward!
Tracy: Ken! You did it! You changed her mind!
Liz: No! No he didn’t! Stop group hugging! Who does that?! [Hits Judge's stick]

Jack: Isn’t this great. We’re together. We’re in line to get into the club. I have my glow stick.
Claire: Uh huh. Yeah and there’s no more Liz trying to keep us apart. No more drama. No more sneaking around, recording our intimate moments and leaving them for Liz on her voicemail.
Jack: What?!
Claire: You know what! I don’t even know what this is any more! Are we boring? Are we some sexless couple that sits in silence at a fish place on a Sunday night at 5:00? Cause if we are, I’ll kill myself!

------

Claire: Guy in the really cool cool hat has a gun!
Jack: Crazy putty! [Runs away]

Harry: I herby declare the new page uniforms at NBC illegal!
Tracy: I added that. I went upstairs and told them that if they don’t bring back the old uniforms, I refuse to play the part of Mac in Universals upcoming ‘Night Court’ movie.
Charles: What’s that now?

[Kenneth punches air and freezes]

Tracy: Are you okay?

Jack: Lemon, the real night court is not at all like that TV show. Do you remember that show?
Liz: I do.
Jack: The hookers are not funny. There are a lot more sickly homeless people and college students. Thank you for bailing me out, Claire threw my wallet down a storm drain. Lemon I'm sorry...
Liz: Look, I'm just glad your okay.
Jack: Thank you for answering your phone.
Liz: I don't know how to decline a call. [Punches Jack in arm]
Jack: Claire used to punch me in the face.
Liz: Ahh!
Jack: Lemon I'm done. I swear. Try this on. [Puts Claire's hat on his head] That's a good look for you. [Liz laughs]

>>>>>OKAY, HERE WE GO!<<<<<

TOP 5 6 MOMENTS.

six.

Jenna: Well well well, a ‘Night Court’ reunion. Funny how I wasn’t invited. Or did you forget about my three episode arc as public defender Sparky Monroe.
Harry: No, we remember, Jenna. You were the werewolf lawyer.
[Flashback]
Jenna: I could prove my client is innocent. If only it weren’t a full mooooon!
[End flashback]
Harry: You made us jump the shark. You’re the reason we didn’t have a 10th season.
Markie: I had just bought my second home when they brought that idiot werewolf lawyer in.
Jenna: Uh, that idiot werewolf paid for my hand reduction surgery ok?

------

Jenna: Kenneth, I can’t believe you’re such a ‘Night Court’ owner and didn’t know I played the werewolf lawyer.
Kenneth: I knew...
Jenna: Very well, I can take a hint. But you haven’t seen the last of Sparky Monroe!

five.

Jack: Up or down ladies?
Liz: Neither, we’re waiting for our old roommate. She’s like a human Macarena - something everyone did at parties in 1996.
Jack: Mi-Ou.
Liz: You’re right, that was harsh.
Jack: No, Mi-Ou. She owns the largest alternative energy company in Asia. So as part of our Green Initiative were doing a reality show about her quest to find a boyfriend.

four.

Liz: Jack has something he’d like to tell you.
Claire: Oh.
Jack: I do. [In agony] I’d like to suck that ring right off your toe. [Turns away] Just got to hack it.
Claire: Oh please stop. Don’t make that angry Muppet face at him.

------

Claire: ...You were trying to keep me away from Jack and you almost fooled me. But then I remembered something - you don't like to have fun. And now your plan has backfired and Jack is seeing the manipulative you. The single white female thing that you have with me.
Liz: I don’t have a single white female thing with you.
Claire: Honey, you moved into my building. You wore chokers because I wore chokers.
Jack: I’d like to choke her.
Claire: Yes. You dated that clown, Joel Suchecky.
Liz: First! I dated him first, Claire. And he wasn’t that clown, he was THE head clowning instructor.

------

Claire: That’s what I’m saying. We all want what’s best for Jack. So why don’t we just get this three way on!
Liz: No!
Jack: No! Right, I mean that's a bad idea right? [Liz tilts her head at him]
Claire: Alright. Well I tried to be the adult. And if only one gets to have him, I'm afraid it's going to be me.

three.

Liz: I was at this club last week… called Chili’s...and I met this smoking guy. He was just raw. [Frank makes a disgusted face]
Claire: Tell me everything.
Liz: I’m going to. He was wearing this shirt...and I could totally see his nips. He was very muscular.
Claire: Did you go home with him?
Liz: Yes...to his loft, where he gave me the "business".

-------

Cerie: You guys should go to Aquarium. It’s this new night club and all the women are in a glass room in the center of the dance floor. And all the guys just watch and feed them.
Claire: That sounds so hot!
Liz: Yeah, thank you Cerie, that’s very helpful.

two.

Liz: Did you see our shout out in Variety? They called us a comedy show!
Jack: Lemon I ran into your friend Claire in the elevator...she is very pretty.
Liz: Nononono, she's nuts when it comes to guys. We had a name for her back in Chicago...it's ah to rude to say out loud. [Writes on magazine]
Jack: [Reads] Crazy putty?
Liz: No.
Jack: OH!
Liz: She’s psycho. She is fatal attraction She is staunchly in favor of Coco Puffs. Do not sleep with her.
Jack: I wish you had told me that about an hour ago. [Claire comes out of bathroom]

one.

Jenna: Why did you leave? I think those Persian guys wanted us to make out together.
Liz: I’m waiting for Claire. She texted me like an hour ago and said she’s getting on the F-Train. Oh no!

I really wasn't sure about the top top moments this time, so I based it on 'laughs per moment'. :P So I welcome your suggestions! :D

FIN.

Quote transcript and screencaps by me; please do not reuse/hotlink elsewhere unless you ask for my permission, thank you!

I would also really appreciate it if you comment to let me know you enjoyed it because it took me some time (not that I didn't enjoy it!). :D

PICSPAM: 30 ROCK [3x02]

Tue, 11 Nov 2008 00:16:26 GMT

I tried to promise myself that I wouldn't do a picspam this week because final exams are on, but seeing as I have a few days spare WHY THE HELL NOT. Oh God, this show runs my life. I swear by it! So in an effort to cut down on capping every single scene in order to shorten my time spent on this, this time I've capped the most golden moments. At first I was going to put them in order of hilarity/amazingness/died on the floor from laughingness, but there were SO many! So I picked my top five, and the rest are just awesome by themselves. Feel free to tell me if you think any of the other moments deserve the 'topness' of top moments. :P I'll shut up now so you can enjoy.

TOP MOMENTS.
(basically the whole show)

Jonathan: Mr. Donaghy is on another call right now and doesn’t have time for a separate interaction with you. So everything he says will have to work for both conversations.
Liz: Really?
Jack: Lemon.
Liz: Lemon works for your business call? I just wanted to let you know that I have to go to Chicago for jury duty, because I never changed my residence to New York.
Jack: Why not?
Liz: Because I wanted to vote in a swing state, Jack. Also I wanted to stay on the mailing list at Chicago Pizza Explosion.
Jack: Well how fast can you turn it around?
Liz: Who me? I’ll fly back in the morning. I never get put in a jury. I wear my Princess Leia costume and they dismiss me immediately.
Jack: Well that sounds good for both of us. Thank you very much sir.
Liz: Ah ha! That last part didn’t work both ways. You said “sir”!
Jack: I think it worked fine.

Tracy: Do you know who I am? Seriously please tell me who I am!

Tracy: Liz Lemon!
Jenna: Yuck.
Tracy: Nemesis.
Jenna: Liz, will you tell Tracy that I don’t even want to speak with him.
Tracy: Ok, two can play at that game. Liz, could you please tell Kenneth that Liz wants him.
Liz: What...the? Ok that’s it. I’m calling Human Resources and setting up a mediation for you.
Jenna: I told you I don’t drink that much at work!
Tracy: Mediation is a binding form of non-judicial dispute resolution. I watched “Boston Legal” nine times before I realized it wasn’t a new “Star Trek”.

Jenna: Tracy, do you know that women are still paid less than men for doing the same job?
Tracy: Do you know it’s still illegal to be black in Arizona?
Jeffrey: Do you know how hard it is to be an overweight trans gender in this country?!

Kenneth: 'Believe in the stars.' It's like that doesn't even mean anything anymore.

------

Kenneth: Was any of it real, Mr. Donaghy? Beer pong? Jazzercise? Women’s Soccer?

Liz: I’m a call you back. I’s snitting next to Borpo!

Toofer: Good grief.
Tracy: Hi strangers. Do you think I’m sexy? Giggle giggle giggle.
Frank: Tracy, I know it’s you. And yeah, I do.
Tracy: I’m meeting my girlfriends for lunch. I hope we can sit outside. Lipsitck!

Jenna: We’re trying to prove who has it hardest in America; women or black men.
Jack: I’ll tell you who has it the hardest. White men. We make the unpopular difficult decisions. We land on the moon and Normandy Beach and yet they resent us.
Kenneth: Well sir, I’m sorry to disagree, but I am also a white man.
Jack: No you are not. Socio-economically speaking you’re like an inner city Latina.

Liz: Oprah smells like rose water and warm laundry.
Cerie: Did she tell you any of her new favorite things for this year?
Liz: Calypso. Paisley. Chinese checkers. And sweater capes?
Cerie: Let’s go to the mall!
Jenna: Did she touch you? [Liz nods and puts out hand]

Just had to add this moment for pure adorableness.

Liz: Oprah!
Pam: [sarcastically] HELLO LIZ LEMOOOONNNN!

--------

Jenna: What were you on? That’s a kid.
Liz: That does explain some of the stuff she said.
[flashback]
Pam/Oprah: I get to fly first class because my Mom’s a flight attendant. I lost my head gear at 6 Flags. My boyfriend is in the 9th grade!
[end flasback]
Liz: It's not Oprah. I thought it was Oprah. It’s a spunky little tween.

Jack: Did you have a good night Kenneth?
Kenneth: Oh yes sir. Hardly any screaming from the Colonel. Actually I was thinking…we all try to be perfect but the world….maybe well… what I’m trying to say…there’s a whole channel on the cabel that just tells you what’s on the other channels!
Jack: I know Kenneth, it's okay.
Kenneth: I’m glad I’m not a white man, Mr Donaghy.
Kenneth: Is Sponge Bob Square Pants supposed to be terrifying?
Jack: You’re darn right he is.
Kenneth: [mouths] I knew it!

Pam: Yesterday, Liz and I realised that she's probably wearing the wrong bra size.
Liz: Ugh!
[flashback]
Pam/Oprah: [Liz opens top] Yep, that one's definately bigger!
[end flashback]
Pam: And that made me feel sad. Now show me your emotion drawings.

Jenna: Liz, we worked it out.
Tracy: I've been hearin'...but I haven't been listening.
Jenna: I need to stop being a frenemy, and be your real BFF. [Tracy holds back emotion]

Jack: It’s ok. It happens to the best of us. In flight medication is how I met M. Night Shyamalan until it turned out to be...[motions head to Jonathon]
Jonathan: That was the best day of my life!

--------

Pam: So, I’ll see you at my parent’s house for dinner. My best friend Gale can’t make it because she has some algebra test.
Liz: Ah Gale…

Jenna & Tracy: [singing] Lean on me. When you’re not strong. And I’ll be your friend…
Jack: We’re not doing that now. Stop that. Do you hear me?

>>>>>OKAY, HERE WE GO!<<<<<

TOP 5 MOMENTS.

five.

Jack: Tyler, I know you’re upset we didn’t pick you for the gold. I’m going to make it up to you. How would you like to host “Deal or No Deal” in the privacy of your own home?
Tyler Brody: I think I’ll hold a press conference instead. Tell the world there’s no such thing as Olympic Tetherball. Or Synchronized Running. Or Octuples Tennis. It was all a lie.
Jack: A white lie that did a lot of good for this country’s moral. Did you know that President Bush’s approval rating was almost as high as 15% following the Olympics?

four.

Liz: Why do you have a monster claw?
Tracy: They ran out of white make up cause I insisted they do my buttocks.

three.

Jack: We have enough oxygen for eight people, unfortunately there are nine of us in here now...one must die.
Kenneth: Mr Donaghy!
Jack: In the panel where the elevator phone should be I've placed a pistol. [Kenneth immediately opens panel and pulls out gun, puts it to his head and releases trigger. Gun does not fire]
Jack: [pushes Kenneths hands down] It's empty.
Kenneth: Then you're gonna have to choke me with my own belt. I will fight you. It’s human nature.
Jack: [opens elevator, walks out] What’s wrong with you?

two.

Oprah: Do you mind if I close the window shade?
Liz: I’m trying to adopt a baby. But my job is making it impossible because my work self is suffocating my life me. I’m Liz Lemon and I lost my virginity at 25. I saw the show about following fear and it inspired me to wear shorts to work. It didn’t go great. Do you know Tracy Jordan? I took a pill earlier. I didn’t get September issue of O Magazine. Do you have the number for subscriptions? [laughs] Why would you!? I eat emotionally and one time at summer camp I kissed a girl on a dare but then she drowned! And here comes some more stuff. I hate my feet and once I had a sex dream about Nate Burkis but halfway though he turned into Dr. Oz. Has that ever happened to you? [Oprah leans over Liz to get drink] Oh a hug! This is happening!
Oprah: [to flight attendant] Please stay close. [to Liz] Could you keep your hands out side your clothes?
Liz: Ok.

one.

Dot Com: Where is Liz Lemon?!
Liz: I don’t really think it’s fair for me to be in a jury because I can read thoughts.
Judge: Dismissed!

FIN.

Quote transcript and screencaps by me; please do not reuse/hotlink elsewhere unless you ask for my permission, thank you!

I would also really appreciate it if you comment to let me know you enjoyed it because it took me some time (not that I didn't enjoy it!). :D

NEVER ALONE.

Fri, 07 Nov 2008 05:31:59 GMT

As some of you know my Father has been battling cancer for almost three years now. He was diagnosed midway through 2006, when I was in Year 11, with Prostate cancer. It soon spread to his stomach and urethra. After an unsuccessful operation which removed his prostate, half of his urethra and part of his stomach tract, he underwent about five months of radical radiation treatment. As of this moment he is not undergoing any treatment, rather recovering from the ordeal of the last two years (still) and having further tests every month or so. My family has never been the same since he was diagnosed, we are not as close because of our inability to address the situation, I went into depression because I felt I had no one to talk to (apart from a psychiatrist at school to whom I felt shy and uncomfortable with when talking about the subject) as well as dealing with my back and health issues and my Mum almost becoming anorexic from stress and looking after all of us.

Internationally, November is the month for raising awareness of Prostate cancer and many other forms of cancer, particularly in men's health. While just about everyone knows of cancer as an illness, not many people know the different types and how serious they can be, and how the illness not only affects the victim, but everyone who is involved in their lives.

This post is just a way for me to spread the word to as many people, as I believe it's important we know about an illness, in all its forms, that has with no justice taken so many lives and devastated others.

I’m not asking you to donate or fundraise for cancer research (though you are more than welcome to!), I just want to spread the word and make sure you if you know someone who is diagnosed with cancer, let them know that they are not alone.

And for the guys, why not grow a mo for Movember! You know you want to. :P

SITES: General Facts || Prostate Cancer Foundation of Australia

That was hard. Thank you for reading. ♥

FINALLY.

Wed, 05 Nov 2008 04:03:06 GMT

OBAMA IS PRESIDENT!!!!!

OMG I'M CRYING RIGHT NOW. ~~284 > 145.~~ 349>147!

This is the most amazing victory ever, haters to the ~~left~~. How very silly of me, it's haters to the RIGHT. LOL. Thanks for pointing that out missfoxie and starlit_trail

PICSPAM: 30 ROCK [3x01]

Sun, 26 Oct 2008 15:54:23 GMT

This is probably the most epic picspam you will ever come across in your life. NO JOKE. I tried so hard to pick the good moments, then the great moments, then the amazing moments, and I still ended up capping nearly the whole episode. But who's to blame? Tina Fey of course. I don't think I could love a show more than I do 30 Rock (I still love you Alias!)

I know this episode hasn't aired on TV yet anywhere, but thanks to some techinical hoodoo (brought to light by my saviour cecism), I was able to watch it a week early. And let me just say, THANK GOD I AM NOT A PATIENT WOMAN.

So, under the cut lies stuff that not even the Gods could come up with...ENJOY! And careful now, I wouldn't want to SPOIL you. You may want to sit down for a minute to let all of this soak in...oh, wait.

Jack: Helloooo pussycat!
Liz: Ugh, really? Lot of ladies get right in the car after that line you creepy piece of...JAAAACK!

I just had to include the awkward but adorable greeting that followed.

Jack: The important thing is that I'm here...and I'm gonna' get my old job back.
Liz: Yes! Please come back Jack, Devon is the worst. It's like he doesn't even care when we should have cake for people whose birthday's are on the weekend.
Jack: The Friday before, at lunch!

Jack: So what's with the outfit Lemon? Did the people from that makeover show finally respond to your letter?
Liz: No, I am dressd up because the adoption agency is doing my home evaluation today.
Jack: Just be yourself Lemon.
Liz: I'm going to be better than myself - my apartment is spotless, I have practiced all my answers, I got rid of all my Colin Firth movies in case they consider them erotica.
Jack: That man can wear a sweater.
Liz: There is no chance that I am blowing this.

Devon: You see the only thing that Kathy and I need assistance with is deciding which John Mayer song to do it to.

Devon: If there's one thing I learnt from you, Jack - is keep your friends close, and your enemies so close that you're almost kissing.

Jenna: Great news guys, I just got a cheque from that Japanese commercial I did. *flashback* Still don't know how that advertises Tokyo University...but I'm going to use this 'three hundred dollars' to buy us all some new boots for me.

Tracy: It's official, I'm a genious. My video game is going through the rizznoof.
Jenna: Well how far through the "rizznoof"?
Dot Com: Woah, that's not slang, he has a speech impediment.
Jenna: Oh...

Liz: So your going to be a mailroom guy...
Jack: I'm the head mailroom guy. I've already been promoted once just this morning.
Liz: That's pretty fast!
Jack: With a little hard work I think I can be back to VP status before I'm sixty.
Liz: And if my home evaluation goes well I will be a mother by fifty. We really can have it all. *Both nod*

Bev: How often do you entertain gentleman sex guests?
Liz: Oo, maybe once a year, maybe, but I'd be open to...cutting it down...
------
Bev: Have you ever been convicted of a crime?
Liz: I was arrested once in Germany for public nudity. I thought it was a topless beach... it was a shipyard.

Jack: I want to be of service...let me help you.
Kathy: *touches Jack's leg and moves her hand up*
Jack: Oh...oh!

Liz: There is a woman coming by the office today...
Writers: Oooooooo!
Liz: No, stop it! Ahh, her name is Bev and she is evaluating me for an adoption.
Writers: Oooooooo!
Liz: I need everyone to be on their best behaviour - no cursing, please take down any pornography that you may have in your office *Pete and other writer immediately get up and run to their offices*...nothing weird.
Frank: Aw, come on it's "Movie Party Thursday". I brought in my tape of circus accidents.
Liz: No, no.
Frank: Please! A lion eats a sad clown.
Liz: Tomorrow. Please just be normal suss for one day. And change that hat.

Jenna: Liz, I have a serious issue.
Liz: Ugh, I told you not to write back to your stalker.
Jenna: Oh no, this is not about Ulanda. Listen Tracy keeps about all the money he's making of this stupid video game. Meanwhile those of us who did the voice-acting weren't even compensated. I mean, I don't do anything for Ulanda and she sends me those headless dolls.
------
Liz: Can I hide this box of penis pasta in your dressing room?

Jack: Lemon, psst. She touched me.
Liz: Who?
Jack: Kathy Geiss. She touched me in my...swimsuit area.
------
Jack: Have you ever been sexually harrassed?
Liz & Jack: Course not.
Jack: I mean how far would I have to let her go to get my own job back? Are we talking over-the-shirt, frontsies, backsies, or would I really have to... give her my gift?
Liz: Ew.

Liz: Nice work Hornberger! Are these...dolls?
Pete: Are they?! They're called "Little Creepers".
Liz: Is it so wrong that I just want to have one of these grow up and resent me?
Pete: Aww, you will.

Liz: Hey Tracy, did you see that thing in the paper today about how Lil' Wayne...that's a person right? Anyway, Lil' Wayne, everytime one of his albums...drops, he buys diamond watches for everybody that worked on it.

Tracy: Let's go shopping. To the Batmobile!
Grizz: Don't worry, he's just leasing it.

Jack: Where are your shoes?!
Devon: Oh, damn it! I must have left them in...my business meeting.
------
Jack: Think about the jobs, the economy - this is GE!
Devon: It's just G now, Jack. I sold the E to Samsung. They're Samesung now. I was supposed to be in a board meeting five hours ago. Which way's Connecticut?

Liz: It would be a really fun place for a kid to grow up...lots of costumes. *Prop falls, someone screams out in pain* *Bev gets out her mark sheet* We're like a big family here.

Liz: Hey Rick!
Fred: I'm Fred, Rick is the other black guy.
Liz: Happens to everyone right Bev...?
Bev: Yeah...it happens all the time to my black husband.

Jenna: ...and I had just broken up with OJ Simpson, and can I just say something - total gentleman.
------
Cerie: Liz is a really good child person and she totally deserves to get custody of her kids.
Bev: It's not a custody case, Liz is trying to adopt a child.
Cerie: Then who were those kids you were yelling at the other day?
Liz: Those were some child actors who had lied about being able to breakdance...
------
Pete: ...but I haven't lived with her for a couple of months now because I've been in an anger management treatment centre because I shot one of my co-workers with an arrow.
------
Frank: I think it's a circus in the Philippines - the lion goes nuts and attacks this older clown. How did we get started talking about this...did you bring it up? *Liz and Bev shake their heads*

Jack: ...I'm doing this for the greater good.
Liz: What are you saying?
Jack: I'm going upstairs to do it with Kathy Geiss.
Note the hip thrust.

Tracy: ...I'd like to thank everyone for making my video game the most profitable thing since the War on Terror! Yes! I am provocative. ...Frank for all your hard work, please accept this set of gold nunchucks... Petey P! For letting us use the soundroom, please accept this chinchilla coat...you gonna' get so much nice nice than that your gonna have
to grow another ding...
Liz: Tracy! This is Bev...
Tracy: *Kisses Bev* You look after my girl Liz Lemon, 'cos me and her go way back like spinal cords and car seats.

Liz: Mr Banks! I thought you were in a Conneticut thing?
Devon: I blew it off. Nice to see you Liz. Let's chit-chat. What's that? Man trouble, boot cut jeans, fun, bye!

Kenneth: Mr Banks! Watch how many push-ups I can do!

Liz: Devon's here!
Jack: Cover yourself.
------
Liz: You smell like strawberries.
Jack: That's the strawberry lip gloss she put on me so I could be her 'fancy boy'.

Jack: Kathy's texted me now, she wants to know where my strawberry mouth is.

*Kathy walks in and sees Bev and Jack together, thinking he's cheating on her, Kathy launches herself at Bev who subsequently gets knocked-out by Franks's nunchucks*

Liz: Do-over...do-over! She doesn't remember anything!

Jack: We might not be the best people...
Liz: But we're not the worst!
Liz & Jack: Graduate students are the worst.

Frank: ...A little moustache in a certain light.

Bev: ...Man, do I have a headache...I'm sorry but your not an ideal candidate.
Liz: But we did everything perfectly this time.
Bev: Hmm?
------
Bev: I'm Bev, I'm here to do Liz's adoption evaluation.
Liz: Ahhhh! Take her to the hospital.

Okay so I capped this scene the most, so much so, I had to break into two parts. You really have to watch it to get what's going on.
Jack: Oh Liz! What are you doing here? I thought you were at the fitness centre with your twin?
Liz: What? *Jack motions to TV where a soap opera is playing*
Jack: ...Kathy you know my lover Liz?
Liz: That better be true Jack, or I'm going to make both of you disappear like I did with Vivianne and...Patch.
Jack: Don't be ridiculous, you know your the only woman I have ever really loved.

Liz: I'm sorry darling *reaches for Jacks face*, I'm just paranoid ever since that incident with the weather machine.
Kathy: Kiss, kiss, kiiisss!
Liz & Jack: *Both lean close to eachother* No...no, no.
Liz: No thank you.

Jack: It's all over Banks, Kathy has hired me privately to advise her in all busines matters.
Devon: My God that's her signature!
Jack: Yeah.

Devon: Check this out. *Walks in front of moving car* I'm going to sue you. I'm going to sue the entire city of New York! I'm going to sue you!
Tracy: You can't sue me, I'm already being sued! Double indemnity.

Jack: Did you need anything else, Lemon?
Liz: No, I just like seeing you in there.

FIN.

Quote transcript and screencaps by me; please do not reuse/hotlink elsewhere unless you ask for my permission, thank you!

I would also really appreciate it if you comment to let me know you enjoyed it considering it took me around five hours of my procrastinating over studying time! ;)

PICSPAM: THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON TRAILERS

Sun, 12 Oct 2008 13:48:40 GMT

It had to be done you guys, you guys it had to be done. ;)

So this picspam is based on the two glorious trailers released so far. I've put the screencaps in order of events based on the sole fact of Benjamin going from old to young. All quotes are taken from either the trailers, short story, or the first drafted script (no spoilers though). Enjoy!

SIDE NOTE: I'm kind of obsessed with this film and have been for the past three years of my life (ever since it went into production), so as you can imagine when the trailers came out someone had to revive me. Have you read the short story? I used to have it read to me when I was younger, it's such a beautiful tale.

My name is Benjamin, Benjamin Button, and I was born under
unusual circumstances. While, everyone else was agin', I was gettin' younger...all alone.

Doctor: I'm afraird he's not of a newborn, but of a man well in his eighties on his way to the grave.
Queenie: You mean he's dying?
Doctor: Of old age.

Preacher: How old are you?
Benjamin: Seven, but I look alot older.
Preacher: God bless you. He's seven!

Sailor: You got your sea legs about you old man?
Benjamin: I guess?

Grace: This is my granddaughter Daisy.

Daisy: Benjamin, Where are you going?
Benjamin: Off to sea, I'll send you a postcard.
Daisy: Write me a postard from everywhere.

Elizabeth: You haven't been with many women, have you?

Benjamin: A hotel in the middle of the night can be a magical, secret place...

Queenie: Remember what I always told you?
Benjamin: Don't be tempted by the shiny apple...don't eat out of the bitter fruit...hunger only for the taste of truth...
big or small, rich or with nothing at all, all you have is your soul.

Daisy: I dream about being with you.
Benjamin: Go back to New York Daisy, go and dance, enjoy the company of people your own age, you will
only be your own age once, don't let anybody take that away from you...including me.

Daisy: Is somebody looking for me?
Benjamin: Hi.
Daisy: Benjamin. What are you doing here?

Benjamin: I thought I'd come here to sweep you off your feet or something.

Daisy: This is my life now!

Benjamin: It's a funny thing coming home...you realise what's changed.

Benjamin: Her left leg was crooked like a question mark...but I didn't mind...she was still the most beautiful woman I had ever seen.

Daisy: Will you love me when I'm forty-five...and fifty and sixty...when you're thirty and twenty-five and twenty...?
Benjamin: I told you I'm going to love you forever. Nothing is going to change that.

Benjamin: And I asked her to come away with me...

Daisy: We're almost the same age. We're meeting in the middle.

Benjamin: I was thinking how nothing lasts. And what a shame that is.
Daisy: Some things last.

Thomas: I would like to go home now.

Benjamin: I'm finding it hard to get used to being called a "young man".

Caroline: It must have broken your heart.

Benjamin: Your so young...

Benjamin: Only on the inside.

Daisy: You used to be odd. Now you make me curious.

Life can only be understood backwards.

Benjamin: Goodnight Daisy.
Daisy: Goodnight Benjamin.

FIN.

Quote transcript and screencaps by me; please do not reuse/hotlink elsewhere unless you ask for my permission, thank you!

FINALLY.

Wed, 08 Oct 2008 15:18:25 GMT

I'M GOING TO ITALY!!!

My best friend and I are just going to do it. There's no point holding it off any longer. And I need to have something to look forward to so bad. Our parents are really encouraging us aswell. June/July next year. I'M SO EXCITED. GAH. I've wanted to go back ever since I've left. This is mental, it's like the best day of my life!

OH, HE TANNED THAT ALRIGHT.

Mon, 25 Aug 2008 14:41:40 GMT

PART TWO.

AND THAT'S ALL I GOT. Perhaps. Today was a sad day. It was weird when I turned on the TV and there were no sweaty or wet men (straight or devoutly gay) to perv at. And I guess I missed the sport factor aswell. :P

But I'm going okay. I had numerous chats with people today about it and I loved that I knew more than them on every sport. JEAH!! No, I'm not up myself.

How are you guys handling the withdrawal? Because, seriously, it's a serious thing, you guys, seriously.

I feel sick. I think I'm getting a migraine because the back of my head is throbbing. :S

T-T-T-T-TOUCH ME.

Sun, 24 Aug 2008 13:38:11 GMT

THAT'S IT! It's over. Sixteen days. Sixteen glorious days. There were some almighty highs. There were some crushing lows. But all in all, Beijing 2008 was an almighty success (though I could say some colourful words about the shit they've covered up). Dominance from certain countries in different sports was certainly the trend for this games.

I've saved a bajillion (okay, maybe like a hundred) pictures from the games and I've decided to compile the best and most fascinating ones for you to gape at. Enjoy!

PART ONE.

</b>

Seriously, there needs to be some sort of support network set-up for people in Olympic withdrawal mode. It's a serious disease. And it's only been two hours since the games came to a close, even though the closing ceremony is still going. We've all made a pact at ontd_olympics to try and help eachother get through this sudden loss. :P And so the shitty soapies and try-hard dramas will be back on, once again reminding me why I only watch the 7 o'clock news and download all the others shows that are actually worth watching.

I watched The Rocky Horror Picture Show last night. I forgot how much fun that movie was. Also, how freaking weird it is. Nevertheless, it brought back some good memories when movies were actually enjoyable. I can't believe there are people even thinking about re-making this movie, like WTF.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my little Olympic spasm, Part Two will be up tomorrow. I've got to go do some Uni study that I was meant to do two weeks ago, but the Olympics were on so it had to wait. Duh. ;P

Less than two weeks until I can legally buy porn! (It's called a joke).